Trigger Warning: This article contains sensitive subject matter relating to abusive relationships and sexual assault.
BY MARISSA CASTANOS
Jessica Kreutzer, now Senior Administrative Assistant of the Criminal Justice Department at Fort Hays, has come forward to speak about her assault that took place in 2008 at her home in Hays. Now, Kreutzer is an advocate for sexual assault survivors and ending abusive relationships. When it comes to the red flags of an abusive relationship, she believes “the biggest red flag that is often missed is the emotional abuse.”
Kreutzer found herself in an emotionally abusive relationship, where she was only allowed to use a certain color of fingernail polish, and only allowed to wear her hair a certain way. Her now ex-boyfriend would also make comments about her job and whether or not it was good enough.
“He told me I needed a more ‘professional’ job in order to be taken seriously and even went as far as trying to get me a job he thought was fit for me,” Kreutzer said.
Her relationship even got to the point where he would drive past her work to make sure she was there, and text or call her to see where she was at if he did not see her car.
After leaving her abusive relationship, Kreutzer experienced something that she says “changes you forever.” One night, Kreutzer was out with her best friend, her best friend’s boyfriend, and her new boyfriend at a club that her boyfriend worked at. When she started to feel ill, Kreutzer went back to her home to try and get some rest. What happened next was an event that still makes her lock her door and stay distant from her friends’ boyfriends to this very day – Kreutzer was sexually assaulted by her best friend’s boyfriend in her own bedroom.
“No means no, no matter where you were at, no matter what you were wearing, and no matter who it was, sexual assault is sexual assault,” Kreutzer said when asked what she wants others to know after her assault.
She went on to say the hardest part of the incident was reporting the assault because she knew that she would lose her best friend, but she also knew that what her assaulter did was wrong.
“I was not going to let him just walk away and do this to someone else,” Kreutzer said.
Kreutzer has used her assault to be able to teach others about sexual assault awareness, and she is one of the big reasons as to why HaysMed now has a Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner (SANE) and Sexual Assault Response Team (SART) program for sexual assault victims.
According to a paper written by Carol Groen and Jessica Albers, before 2010, victims of sexual assault who sought justice for the crime committed to them had two options if they lived in Ellis County and surrounding counties. They could be seen by a nurse and physician who collected a rape kit at Hays Medical Center, or they could drive 100 miles to Salina, to the closest central Kansas SANE program for specialized care.
In July of 2010, HaysMed started its first SANE program and was dedicated to providing the necessary care for victims of sexual assault. Victims could be seen by on-call SANE nurses who are aware of the importance in providing care in a safe environment. Within the first six months of the program’s existence, it saw 10 patients; in 2014, 58 patients received sexual assault exams.
Because of what happened to Kreutzer, along with support from various community members including Fort Hays faculty, staff, and students, the residents of Ellis County now have a place where they can go to feel safe and cared for after experiencing one of the most traumatic events in their lives. Kreutzer is proud to call herself a survivor and hopes her story can inspire others to come forward and seek help after an assault.